Well. That got your attention quickly, didn’t it? After all, I just committed a terrible hate crime by declaring my dislike for a certain sexual preference that happens to be “oppressed” and discriminated against by the majority of the populace. My entry of the day, then, is to convince you that it is perfectly a-okay to proclaim your dislike for homosexuality.
Firstly, what is homosexuality? Ah, well of course we must consult our dear Mr. Webster for an official-looking definition, since people plagued with Stupidity Type C (see entry below for further reading) can’t seem to accept anything other than these convoluted dictionary-drawn words.
Main Entry: ho·mo·sex·u·al
Pronunciation: \ho-m?-’sek-sh(?-)w?l, -’sek-sh?l\
[In Vivi’s opinion, the correct enunciation: ho-mo-’sek-sh?w-al]
Function: adjective
Date: 1892
1 : of, relating to, or characterized by a tendency to direct sexual desire toward another of the same sex
2 : of, relating to, or involving sexual intercourse between persons of the same sex
Rephrasing the title of this entry will generate, “I dislike directing sexual desires or engaging in sexual intercourse with another female.”
How is this perfectly honest and perfectly truthful statement anything offensive? Would the general populace be offended if I said I preferred chocolate to vanilla ice cream? Why, then, are they all up in arms when I declare that I would prefer heterosexuality to homosexuality, which are in theory just different “flavours” of sexuality?
What people don’t seem to realize is that there is a difference between saying, “I hate homosexuality” and “I hate homosexual people.” One declares a personal preference, the other implies discrimination. I’m sure even the most closed-minded amongst you can figure out which corresponds to which. I would understand and sympathize (not empathize, sorry) with the sentiments of the general populace if I had stood up in a crowded room and shouted, “I hate every single gay and lesbian in this room.” That is naturally a waste of my breath and derogatively discriminatory. That would be, indeed, a blatant display of uncalled-for hate.
However, I have not commited this crime. I haven’t purposely called out homosexuals as targets of my spite; I haven’t condemned them all to the ninth layer of hell; I haven’t ruled out their intelligence, their ability, and their rights as humans. I just simply don’t -agree- with them and would rather not participate in their activities. Has the general populace become so sensitive and/or ignorant that it can no longer accept the fact that people have different opinions, and that some of us would like to voice our opinions? Have people just naturally come to associate the blunt statement, “I dislike homosexuality” with the hurtful, “I automatically hate every single homosexual person for biased reasons”? Perhaps it’s about time that people really -think- about the statements they are hearing and sort out the fact from the implied.
To conclude, there is no harm in declaring one’s dislike for homosexuality (the idea) as it does not mean they additionally unreasonably dislike the practitioners (the homosexual people themselves). Just because I dislike homosexuality doesn’t mean you can’t like it. Just because I dislike homosexuality doesn’t mean I think you’re going to be eternally damned for it. To each his own. My opinions are mine and I have a right to express them as long as they don’t hurt anyone’s feelings, and in this case they don’t. Unless you’re like the petty child who cries when none of his friends like nor want to discuss the same TV show he does.
And for those curious, my opinion on homosexuality? I don’t like it. I would rather my family not be homosexual, I don’t like it when lesbians hit on me, and when (if?) I have children I would hope they do not choose to engage in homosexual practices. HOWEVER, I realize that we are all ultimately free-willed beings, and if my friends should choose to pursue homosexuality as their lifestyle of choice, I really can’t do anything about it, and I really don’t mind since being homosexual ultimately doesn’t change the intellectual and character potential of a person. Unless, of course, they end up being one of those hippies who parade around in rainbows screaming about how they’re always “oppressed”, in which case I would tell them to please stop putting on a freakshow.
To wrap this up, I’d like to present a scientific take on homosexuality for the giggles (I don’t mean to offend: all jokes should be taken lightly and this is no exception): If success in a biological standpoint is equivalent to being able to successfully reproduce and pass on your genetic information, doesn’t that mean homosexuals are failures of nature?
Just some food for thought.
Added content as an afterthought: In case it wasn’t clear the first time I mentioned it (did kind of get lost up there), I dislike homosexuality because I would rather not engage in sexual acts with another of the same gender as I. Yes, I realize this begs the question, but I really can’t explain it in better terms. I’d rather have sex with a man, the way it’s meant to be done. I realize that homosexuality is innately not a choice - there have been scientific studies done to prove that there are significant hormonal, chemical, and/or neural differences between heterosexuals and homosexuals**. However, the extent to which one chooses to pursue or be flamboyantly open about their sexual preference can be controlled. I would rather the homosexuals (and heterosexuals, for that matter) keep their “gay pride” and “uncontrollable love” confined to the bedroom. I do not want to see couples standing in the middle of the road having wild make-out sessions, be they male/female or male/male. There’s no need to exhibit all this “pride” for a sexual preference if it’s truly the way you’re born (same with racial pride, but that’s another entry). “Oh yes, I’m proud that the randomness of nature somehow managed to make me homosexual; now let me parade in the streets and rally my fellow oppressed lesbians.” Please no, don’t take homosexuality to a foolish extreme. Keep it to yourself and your lover, and all will be good.
** Please see this excellent collection of links for more information on the “born that way” theory; you’ll find that most professionals are in mutual agreement that it is a combination of biological (not necessarily genetic, mind you) and environmental factors that contribute to homosexuality. There are also various testimonies from those who have attempted to “convert” from homosexuality and heterosexuality, both failures and successes alike. A rather interesting read from people who know what they’re talking about.
July 23rd, 2008 at 8:20 pm
While you’re obviously allowed to have such an opinion, nowhere did you explain /why/ you don’t like homosexuality. You only said that you’d rather not deal with it or see it happen. Can I ask why? I’m really curious.
I don’t want to argue, but I’m not so sure about the part where you state it’s a choice. It isn’t always. Sometimes you just can’t help who you fall in love with, even if it happens to be someone of the same gender.
And on the final note, I suppose all the people that are infertile or choose to be childfree are failures of nature too. :) I know you weren’t trying to be offensive there, but c’mon. ;)
July 23rd, 2008 at 8:33 pm
“While you’re obviously allowed to have such an opinion, nowhere did you explain /why/ you don’t like homosexuality”
ya she did
“I don’t want to argue”
now you are
“Sometimes you just can’t help who you fall in love with”
yup
“even if it happens to be someone of the same gender”
nope
“And on the final note, I suppose all the people that are infertile or choose to be childfree are failures of nature too.”
well they are so why are you hoping when it’s fact o_O
“I know you weren’t trying to be offensive there, but c’mon. ;)”
lol
July 24th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
lol wut. Nice blind whiteknighting there. You don’t know what you’re talking about at all, and somehow misread my comments and twisted them to try and be cool.
I suppose by the actual definition of arguing, such as bringing up an alternate point, I did, but my intention was rather not to be rude and I’m rather sure I did that, unlike some people and their inane one-word responses. And there was nothing about “hoping” in that comment so much as just adding so that the original statement wasn’t singling out homosexuals.
Now that Vivi has added her after content I think I understand a little more, but I’m still just as confused.
Ok, so you don’t like homosexuality. You’re describing it like you don’t like fishing or you don’t like pie. Sure. But you also go on to say how you would rather your friends/family not do it. Why is /this/? This isn’t as simple as not liking vanilla, as one that doesn’t like vanilla usually won’t say how they sure wish nobody else would eat it either. That’s like extremist vegetarians that try to make all their friends stop eating meat too. If that’s how you feel about homosexuality, that’s fine, but then you may not want to compare it to the simple dislike of a hobby or a food.
Is it because you just don’t want to see it? But you say the same for heterosexuals, that you don’t want to see their PDA’s either. Okay. More confused now. But you like heterosexuality, because you’re heterosexual. So how does this relate exactly? Is it worse if it’s homosexual?
The thing is that there IS a lot of oppression. Putting that in quotes as if it doesn’t exist is treading on more than just stating how you feel. Do you think it’s okay that there’s hate crimes and that people being killed because they’re homosexual? Like the story of the 15 year old boy that was shot dead because he said he was gay? That I would like to know. Hopefully someone that isn’t you won’t find the need to pick apart my comments this time. I suppose next time I should just e-mail you privately. :) I’m sad I haven’t even gotten a direct response from you yet either.
July 24th, 2008 at 5:41 pm
I dislike commenting on my own posts (hence why I decided to add on to my entry the previous time instead) but as you’ve given me no method of getting back to you, I suppose I shall write a bit in response right here.
Going back to analogies: I don’t know about you, but whenever I come across something that I dislike - be it a flavor of ice cream that I think tastes disgusting, a TV show I think is poorly acted, or a musical artist I think is grating to the ears, I tell/recommend others not to eat/watch/listen/etc. to said item at hand. Likewise, I find homosexuality a strangely awkward item that is disagreeable to reproductive human nature. As such, I would tell my fellow friends/family that I personally find it a distasteful lifestyle. Just like the child who enjoys it when his friends share his same interests, thus I am happy when others are in agreement with my lifestyle.
On the other hand, should they choose (that’s an iffy word) to ignore my suggestions and pursue their own lifestyles, that’s a-okay with me. I appreciate their time to listen to my opinions, but I also believe in the every-man-to-himself principle and it is ultimately their choice whether they listen to my requests to share in my interests or not. I see no harm in people sharing their opinions and suggesting that others take the same route. Using your comparison with vegetarians - I have many vegetarian/vegan friends who have suggested to me that I should give up meat. They name their reasons for believing that it is a superior lifestyle to an omnivore diet; I listened to their points; and ultimately I decided to opt out on becoming an herbivore. I don’t mind people attempting to convert me, but I would also appreciate it if, after I sit and listen to them and state that I disagree, they cease to bother me about the situation. Since I would seem a hypocrite otherwise, I too accept and respect people’s choices to forgo my suggestions. My desire for friends/family to be heterosexual is nothing more than a simple recommendation system comparable to Digging a story.
I’m sorry if I was treading on toes by placing the word oppression in quotes; granted I did have the intention of placing sarcasm in my sentence, but now that I reread my words, I sincerely apologize if I have offended you in that way. However, I am in no way, shape, or form okay with discriminatory hate crimes. I am of the belief that people are free to like, dislike, or hate whatever they choose as long as they don’t forcefully try to push these beliefs on others: I’m fine with vegetarians calmly telling me they think their lifestyle is superior to mine; I am not okay with them pointing a gun at my head and telling me to stop eating meat or they’ll shoot my brains out. Likewise, I believe it is fine when people (like myself) calmly suggest that we think heterosexuality is the better of the lifestyles (and then follow it up by remaining accepting of others’ differing opinions); it is not fine if I take an ax to someone’s head just because they aren’t heterosexual like I am.
July 24th, 2008 at 8:22 pm
It’s one thing to say you hate something pretty insignificant, like “I hate vanilla ice cream,” but when you say “I hate homosexuality,” that’s a much deeper statement to make, because love and who we love is something that is at the core of our lives as humans. Food preferences don’t define us- but who we choose to love and live our lives has a much greater significance.
If you don’t agree with your vegetarian friends, do you say, “I hate vegetarianism?” Probably not, because their choice to be a vegetarian has little impact on you. Then why such a strong reaction to homosexuality? What other people, straight or GBLT, do behind closed doors has little impact on you either. Would have a similarly strong reaction if your child or boyfriend one day announced, “I’m giving up meat!” ?
PS. sorry I don’t have a blog or anything, if you would like to respond the easiest thing would be another comment. :)
July 24th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
I sincerely believe that many of my readers are severely misinterpreting the statement that I wish to make. When I declare my dislike for homosexuality, I reflect my personal beliefs. In other words, I dislike personally practicing homosexuality (and thusly would prefer to practice heterosexuality). Others’ preferences of a homosexual lifestyle to a heterosexual one is not my problem until they shove it in my face.
Perhaps I’m just insensitive because my entire life I have never really cared about others’ fleeting opinions of me (in which case I suppose it would be my fault for not being more sympathetic?) However, I am of the belief and school of thought that -my- likes and dislikes should not be taken offensively my those who don’t like them and vice versa. I certainly am not offended by the fact that some homosexuals dislike heterosexuality; why is it that they should be offended that I dislike homosexuality?
I understand your concern that claiming dislike for homosexuality is a much deeper statement than simplying declaring distaste for a food item. On that level, then, would one be offended if said, “I would dislike loving a man younger than me” when the person I happened to be speaking to was the man of a wife 10 years his elder? In my opinion, if one found offense in this, they would, to put it bluntly, be a rather shallow person - just because I would dislike this aspect of love doesn’t mean that I condemn those who like it.
If you don’t agree with your vegetarian friends, do you say, “I hate vegetarianism?” Probably not, because their choice to be a vegetarian has little impact on you… Would have a similarly strong reaction if your child or boyfriend one day announced, “I’m giving up meat!”?
I’ll say it right now - I dislike vegetarianism. NOT on the basis because I disagree with my friends, but because I believe I would dislike being unable to eat meat. Why should someone find it offensive that I dislike their lifestyle? If my child or boyfriend ever announced that they were going vegetarian, I would ask them about the basis of their decision, and eventually accept them while still holding to the fact that I personally dislike vegetarianism. However, I wouldn’t let my dislike of their lifestyle affect how I treat them as a friend or normal human being (I actually have quite a few lesbian/gay friends).
Likewise, my dislike has equally little impact on them; I do not try to force them out of vegetarianism (or homosexuality) - my dislike is strictly isolated to myself. So this is my cue to be confused - why would someone find my personal preferences offensive? Doesn’t that just exhibit an extreme amount of insensitivity on their part?
Oh, and just so there’s no misunderstandings or anything: I’m not offended at all by any of the comments you guys are making, and you both raise some very good points that I actually had to stop and contemplate. As long as the discussion remains sane and logical, I’m happy to respond =)
July 24th, 2008 at 9:37 pm
“when you say “I hate homosexuality,” that’s a much deeper statement to make, because love and who we love is something that is at the core of our lives as humans”
it is up to you to believe how strongly she really wanted to declare “hate”. But when you reanalyze this blog entry, maybe hate is used inaccurately.
See, we (ya i share her feelings) don’t hate homosexuals, they are just wrong. When you look at natural selection, what would happen if the world was run in a way that inherent benefits did not exist?
In this world, people that developed due to devastating DNA mutation get benefits. Our taxes go to schools that waste money teaching a handful of brain damaged students how to survive in the world. The funny thing is that we don’t need to discriminate against those people… they would sort of die from natural selection.
Homosexuals could also be controlled by natural selection but they still get benefits. Not to mention, law prohibits the destruction of the freedom to life in the United States.
But here’s the problem. Homosexual agendas are a NON-ISSUE. People are just disgusted by their sexual preferences and their public displays of said desires. This isn’t a prejudice since you don’t grow up liking gay people, they’re just nasty if you’re not gay too.
So here’s the deal, if you want to stop your hating, you’ll have to introduce laws that restrict hate.
But… the RIAA and MPAA are already doing this - learn from their mistakes. Or don’t learn at all and see what happens, you’re choice right?
July 24th, 2008 at 10:23 pm
Dislike is a very ambiguous word. I dislike root beer, I would rather not drink it, and I also think it’s gross. I dislike spiders so much that I wish they would never ever be in my room. If you were to say simply that you dislike homosexuality, I would be confused. Do you mean that you are straight, or do you think that homosexuals are gross, or do you mean that you are afraid of them and never ever want them in your room?
In a perfectly literal world, you could say “I dislike homosexuality,” and people would translate it to, “I am a straight woman, and I like men,” just as people translate “I dislike vanilla ice cream” literally as a personal preference. It’s not that people find your personal preferences as a straight female offensive. I suppose the reason why I was taken aback by the statement “I dislike homosexuality,” is because of all the underlying questions that come with it. Homosexuality is such a hot-button issue in today’s world, that it is hard to know if someone who proclaims his or her dislike for homosexuality simply means that they are straight (the literal meaning), or if they mean that they dislike homosexuality because they themselves are straight, and additionally they also think it is immoral/wrong and thus view it as something that should be changed.
People don’t take the literal, cut-and-dry meaning of disliking homosexuality because it is such a divisive issue. Hate crimes are very prevalent, and a lot of people don’t have your attitude of to each his own. But the fact is, that homosexuality is NOT accepted by our society as a whole, and so people don’t take your literal meaning and are on the defensive when you express your personal preference (albeit, in my opinion, in an ambiguous manner).
July 24th, 2008 at 10:42 pm
Ahh, I understand a little better what you’re getting at now. My meaning of “dislike” would be most akin to the first option you offered, with a slight lean on the second, as I find disturbing the homosexuals who want to engage in sexual activities with me - this doesn’t, of course, mean that I think two homosexuals interacting is gross if they are in mutual agreement of their feelings, only those who insist on hitting on me after I have made it clear I am straight ;)
My entry, perhaps, was too ambiguous; I was attempting to advocate for a shift to a slightly more literal response to the statement “I dislike homosexuality”. I don’t wish to -force- my ideas on people, persay, but I admit I would find it nice if we did away with the idea of injecting implied ideas into a simple statement of preference. Likewise, many of the misunderstandings and hurt feelings that are prevalent both in the present world and throughout history could have been eliminated had the offended reassessed their reactions to various statements - perhaps if they had not assumed too much from what they heard and/or hadn’t attached negative emotions from a statement (such as mine), they would find that much of the general hate for the lifestyle is not directed at them, but is merely an extreme display of personal preference.
July 24th, 2008 at 10:45 pm
“Our taxes go to schools that waste money teaching a handful of brain damaged students how to survive in the world. The funny thing is that we don’t need to discriminate against those people… they would sort of die from natural selection.”
Then why should we waste our money trying to find cures for cancer? Bother trying to save the life of someone who was just in a car accident? We should just leave them be. It’s their bad luck, let them die from natural selection. There should be no doctors! Only the strongest survive!
“Homosexuals could also be controlled by natural selection but they still get benefits.”
What benefits? Besides, even if you were to adopt the cold vision that everything can be controlled by natural selection, your statement is incorrect. If homosexuality is a choice, then no amount of natural selection will make homosexuality extinct. If you believe it is biological, then clearly natural selection has no affect since there were gay people long before artificial insemination was invented.
“Homosexual agendas are a NON-ISSUE. People are just disgusted by their sexual preferences and their public displays of said desires. This isn’t a prejudice since you don’t grow up liking gay people, they’re just nasty if you’re not gay too.”
Maybe you should be more tolerant, and try to accept that fact that just because someone isn’t the same as you, doesn’t mean that he or she is “nasty.” Think outside of yourself, about the feelings of others perhaps?
July 24th, 2008 at 10:51 pm
@Vivi:
Yeah, I agree with what you said about how getting hit on (by guys or girls) when you’ve made it clear that the advance is unwanted is creepy to the max. I live in a big city, believe me, I am familiar with that situation lol.
Anyway, I really like reading your blog entries, and I’m sure we’ll meet come august :)
July 27th, 2008 at 6:22 am
Gay people are funny.
End of story.
July 29th, 2008 at 3:35 pm
Sapphi;
“Gay people are funny.”
I find this extremely offensive. This is different than simply stating, “I dislike homosexuality”. You are accusing all homosexuals of being ‘funny’ and come off as close-minded.
July 29th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
Ok, some things are cleared up now. Thank you for taking the time to respond, Vivi. =)
I agree with MIT ‘12. The way you were presenting yourself made it sound like you meant you hated homosexuals, etc. It’s a touchy subject indeed, and not as easy as saying “I dislike vanilla ice cream”. ;)
I must say I am still a tad confuzzled over your stance. It’s like “It’s not for me, and I’m not interested in seeing it nor do I think you should do it, but do it if you must and I won’t hate you for it”, perhaps? Ha ha ha.
You don’t feel as strongly about homosexuality being “nasty” as damentz does, do you?
July 29th, 2008 at 5:43 pm
@ Arati:
What’s wrong with being funny? I personally would take it as a compliment to be called funny.