Crimsonietta.net

Warning: extremely long entry ahead!

TABLE OF CONTENTS
I. In the Beginning
II. The Cast of the Play
III. A Typical Day in APCS 8th
IV. When We Actually Programmed
V. AP Test Prep
VI. Why I Enjoyed APCS
VII. At the End of the Day
VIII. And the Future Draws Near

I’m not a nerd. I swear. I just love my CS class way too much.
This one’s for you guys.

———————————————————————————–

–> IN THE BEGINNING: there was a [not-so]-typical CS class
(or, “‘Hello World’ makes a much better intro than ‘Once upon a time’”)

I was a feeble-minded, newbie senior, fresh out of an extremely boring year of Pre-AP (Honors) Computer Science 1. While selecting courses for the 2007-08 school year, I had very adamantly shouted at my parents that I would rather throw myself out a 3rd-story window than take another year of Computer Science. As such, I was scheduled into the torturous AP Statistics for 8th period. After two weeks of graphing every kind of statistical graph possible by hand each night, I was fed up with the BS. With newfound frustration, I marched right into the counselor’s office and demanded, in the most determinedly pissed-off voice that I could muster without sounding disrespectful, that I wanted to be moved into Computer Science 2 (APCS A) for 8th period instead.

… I had no idea what I was getting into.

The first day of class, I walked in demurely and - dare I say - almost shyly. Gave a small nod to Ms. Pittman as she exclaimed her joy for my return for another year of being her victim, waved to Nik and Spencer, and reclaimed my CS1 seat smack dab in front of Ms. Pittman’s own desk area on the right side of the room. The entire class (which ended up being combined CS2/CS3), save for Brendan/Spencer/Nik, was densely gathered on the left side of the room, and the three who had chosen the right side had successfully scooted as far left as was possible. I felt completely isolated and awkward. I didn’t really know many of these people very well, and until this year, I usually didn’t associate with guys. So for a week or so I would enter, sit down at my little island, finish all of my programs at record speed, and spend the rest of the time coding PHP or doing research for my science fair project, all the while listening to everyone else laugh and exchange jokes. It was a rather lonely time in my life.

Then one day during AP Physics C, Ben suggested that I should join them on the left side of the room for CS. After all, there was exactly one vacant seat, just waiting for me to occupy it. Thus, the next day I pranced into class almost giddily, plopped down at computer #10, and announced to the group, “Hey guys. I’m going to sit over here with you now.”

… I REALLY had no idea what I was getting into.

———————————————————————————–

–> THE CAST OF THE PLAY: little dot of pink in a sea of blue
(or, “Yeah, these are the people I like hanging around with. Seriously.”)

Before I progress with my eulogy, it would help if you get a general idea of the people I’m talking about; we’re not your typical group of nerds. We swear.

Ms. Pittman: the dictator. Snickers with glee when students complain about how many programs they have left to do when the due date is less than 24 hours away. Fortunately enjoys a good bit of snarky sarcasm, especially when answering stupid questions. Shoves cheesy Leon-Schram-composed notes down our throats daily, and then sits in her little corner of the room and let’s us do whatever until Nate spazzes out, in which case she demands he shut up.

Brandon Smith: quiet. Studious. The person all the CS3 people ask for help because unlike the rest of us he actually does his work and understands what the hell he does. Extremely eloquent, even when telling you off.

Spencer Hardin: also extremely quiet, but oftentimes owns you at shit that you had no idea he could do. Possesses the visage of a huggable teddy bear, and can be just as nice or ferocious as one. Liked by everyone, hated by none.

Nik Poklitar: the guy that you find extremely hard to take seriously because he’s always bouncing in his chair to mock everyone else’s enthusiasm. Will say the most randomass things and expect the most randomass answers in response. Too bad no one’s on his same wavelength, but we enjoy him as comic relief.

Steven Barrett: the guy I called an antisocial geek upon first impression. Sits back in his chair and makes snide comments that everyone can’t help but laugh at while Ms. Pittman tries to conduct a review for an upcoming exam. The one person everyone wants on their Warsow team, the one person who attempts to convert everyone else to Linux (succeeds 2% of the time), the one person we can actually tolerate to make fun of our code, the one person who automagically notices any instance of UTTER FAIL, and the only person who names Java variables after the most obnoxious objects.

Alex Innes: long blonde hair that falls in his eyes, constantly making “pfft” noises out of exasperation or frustration that everyone wants to pick on him. Buries his nose in stereotypical fantasy novels and continually commits instances of UTTER FAIL (and thus results in being outed by Steven), but thankfully has the good nature to tolerate our equally continual pointing-out of said failures. Acts like he doesn’t care that he doesn’t have any friends, but everyone knows he does care. Plays Warsow with the Windows Task Manager covering half the screen. Hey now, that takes skill. To fail that hard, I mean.

Khanh Nguyen: or is it Ngyuen? The guy with the name that no one can spell correctly. The guy with the broken spacebar and atrociously unreadable code. The guy who can’t speak English without a heavy Vietnamese accent. The guy that owns everyone else at chess. The guy that is constantly asking Ben and me for help. The guy that could probably beat you up if he would stop smiling for half a second and get serious.

Ben Sullivan: the Mr. Congeniality of the class (if such a thing exists amongst CS nerds), loved by everyone as Spencer is (only he actually talks.. a lot), actually makes an attempt to understand the badly-put-together Powerpoints that notes come packaged in, and always ready to have a nice conversation. As close to the perfect student as perfect gets in CS2.

Clayton Dorsett: thinks he’s all that but really isn’t. Thinks he knows how to get into people’s minds and assess them from a psychological standpoint.. but really can’t. Thinks he knows more than everyone else, thinks he’s funny, thinks he can play FPSes, thinks he can program like no other, thinks he knows more about quantum physics than I do. The only thing that he can seem to do is generate false hope for himself. Admittedly does create a funny once in a while, but most of the time, like Innes, is a target for jokes and Vivi’s constant calls of “you’re retarded.”

Russell Bosenbark: the guy with the long hair that got chopped off second semester and thus resulted in people thinking he was a new student. Rather quiet, occupies the leftmost seat in the backmost row, and watches our daily antics unfold with an bemused look on his face.

Thomas ??: the little pipsqueak of the bunch; scrawny and skinny and very noticeably less talkative than the rest of us. Asks for help on homework and programs constantly, but still somehow manages to stay fairly normal. In fact, the most normal of everyone, with only Brandon and Russell trailing behind at a tie for second.

Nate Claggett: the annoyance. Came into our class second semester, and during the first class with us, successfully made Vivi so pissed off she wanted to punch him in the face or kick him in the balls or both. Obnoxiously loud, obnoxiously brash, and obnoxiously repetitive in his obnoxiousness. Does succeed in being very funny at times (a rarity), and can also be extremely and sincerely nice when he wants to (also a rarity). Ms. Pittman’s favourite… to yell at.

Vivian Lee (yours truly): the little dot of pink in a sea of blue. In other words, the only member of the class blessed with not-one-but-two X chromosomes. Actually spends four hours doing applet programs, only to discover that Clayton managed to complete them in only 40 minutes (albeit less elegantly). Constantly sighs and complains of how unfair life is to garner attention. Owns everyone else at program challenges. and tests. and pretty much everything else. Until the end of the year, that is. Then she just sat around and poked fun at innocent classmates while Ms. Pittman complained that everyone was wasting all their time. Addicted to cards like no other. Brings food for the entire class on various occasions and enjoys watching everyone fight over it.

———————————————————————————–

–> A TYPICAL DAY IN APCS 8TH: Ms. Pittman’s notes are boring
(or, “Are you finished programming yet so we can play Warsow?”)

[2:09] “Oh, that’s the bell for end of 7th. Sweet. I’m going to make it to CS first today.”
[2:10] “Hah. For once I’m the first one in clas– nevermind. That freaking Steven Barrett beat me again.”
[2:12] “So Vivian, did you do that program?” “Duh, of course. And it only took me 3 hours this time!”
[2:14] “Are grades updated?” *saunters over to gradesheet* “Fuck, I got a 79 on the latest program?”
[2:15] “Eh. That’s the bell for start of 8th. Where’s Clayton? And Ben, how long are notes?”
[2:20] <random insults>
[2:25] “Yeah, see, if you add this line here– oh well damn. Computers taken over for notes.”
[2:26] “… 75 slides?! Come on Ms. Pittman, it’s a Friday. Well, no it’s not, it’s a Tuesday. But it feels like a Friday. Right guys?”
[2:35] *puts head down on desk*
[2:45] *raises head* “Are notes over yet?”
[2:46] “Oh, they aren’t. Well then.” *puts head down again*
[3:10] “And now, CS3, time for your notes.” “Hells yes, CS2 is finally free.” <incohesive grumbling from CS3 here>
[3:20] “Sweet. Notes are over.” “… how did the CS3 notes only take ten minutes and ours ended up being 30 minutes long?!”
[3:22] “Oh fuck guys, we have six programs due tomorrow.” “Shit. Better get to work.”
[3:25] “… okay is anyone actually understanding how to do this program?”
[3:28] “… hey guys wanna play Warsow?”
[3:35] “You guys do know you have six programs due tomorrow, right?” “WHAT?! You didn’t tell us this before, Ms. Pittman!” “Yeah, maybe we should program instead…”
[3:36] “… naaah. We can finish tomorrow during lunch.”
[3:37] <random insults>
[3:38] <obnoxiously screaming from Nate> “NATE. CALM DOWN.” “Oooh, owned by Ms. Pittman.”
[3:40] <utter fail committed>
[3:41] <more random insults>
[3:44] “Bell will ring in 59.. 58… 57…” “STFU ALEX.”
[3:45] <final bell> “Shit guys. We didn’t get anything done today.”
[3:46] “… oh crap. We actually had a program due today, didn’t we? Who’s staying behind to finish?”

———————————————————————————–

–> WHEN WE ACTUALLY PROGRAMMED: and when we didn’t
(or, “Did you actually do the program? No, Steven did it for me and got me a 73.”)

2% of the time we actually programmed and complained about how easy the assignment was
10% of the time we anguished over program challenges, tests, and programs
20% of the time we actually had non-sarcastic, interesting conversations about life
28% of the time we programmed and complained about how hard the assignment was
40% of the time we - well, everyone else besides me - played Warsow and I watched
100% of the time we sat around insulting each other’s intelligence
Oops, that’s more than 100%. Integer overflow.

Programs: consisted of Ms. Pittman dumping a ton of .pdfs into the K:\ drive, which we picked up and read. Contained in each was no less than 6 pages describing - at times vaguely, at times incredibly specifically - the task that our programs were supposed to complete. So you (or you + another classmate, or sometimes simply the other classmate, whom you bribed) would complete the program exactly as the .pdf dictated and submit it. The next day, as you strode in feeling good about yourself, you would check the gradesheet posted on the front board and see that you got a terrible grade on said program. Your day would turn hopelessly bleak and you’d stumble back to your seat mumbling about how unfair CS is, while Ms. Pittman happily skips over and hands you the grade summary for the program… in which you realize you got -10 points for not making good enough comments, another -20 for accidentally misinterpreting one of her assignment descriptions, and a -15 simply for not submitting the .class file that is created after compilation.

Tests and quizzes: consisted of Ms. Pittman verbally reviewing everyone, with Steven and Clayton constantly interrupting with bits of sarcasm, and Ben interjecting with random questions because unlike everyone else, he felt the need to understand what was going on. The day of the actual examination, Ms. Pittman would toss down the packets and scantrons while outcries of anguish and nervous last-minute laughs were shared, for example:

Me: *picks up test packet* Damn, it’s thick.
Clayton: That’s what she said!
<cue 5 minutes of continuous laughing>

After that, everyone would fall into a frightening silence (something I believed impossible based on daily experiences), occasionally sighing in frustration. I always ended up finishing first (after checking over my answers thrice) and having to sit around controlling my incessant desire to say something to the effect of, “It’s too quiet in here.” Gradually everyone else would finish, except Clayton, and we would all attempt to silently share jokes and program while tossing sideways glares at him the entire time. If you haven’t guessed, I hate silence.

Program challenges: kicked everyone’s butt because they were all frustratingly hard. This basically had the intensity of an astronaut’s training simulation as we spread ourselves through the room and worked through a series of 15 long programs, each of which would not compile and we had to “fix” according to Ms. Pittman’s specifications. Usually her requested method of correction ended up being harder than the obvious method (I remember once she asked us to create a method using iteration, and I had to opt for recursion because I couldn’t get it to work otherwise). Program challenges would occur at the end of each six-weeks grading period and last the entire class period. Once the bell rang, everyone would throw down their hands in exasperation and exclaim how much we had gotten owned. The next class period, I would gloat about my received 105 while everyone else (except Ben) stared demurely at their 70’s.

Homework: was never finished unless it was a worksheet. And even so, half the people copied off others, and programs never seemed to be done until the lunch period before class. I actually prided myself on being a clean-record student until the day I was nearly having a breakdown from the influx of work and decided to shove one innocent program onto Steven’s platter instead. And good lot that did me: I ended up with a 73. Attempted corrections. Still got the exact same things wrong as he had.

… I guess sometimes you just need a little wake-up call that you can’t win at everything.

———————————————————————————–

–> AP TEST PREP: if I see Gridworld one more time…
(or, “Hey, let’s play War– oh shit. The AP test is TOMORROW?!”)

“As you all know, MBCS was phased out last year, so instead, both of the classes will be studying Gridworld in preparation for the AP test coming up in two weeks.”

Gridworld? Two weeks?!

“I’ll start you out with my incredibly-long-winded 80 slides of notes.”

You’ve got to be kidding me.

“Alright. First, take a look at these methods…”

Okay, Ms. Pittman, this isn’t funny.

“To practice on what you’ve learned today, check the K:\ drive for your first 7 programs due next week.”

Shit. She’s serious.

And thus began the journey to the AP test. I’m not exaggerating - there ended up being a grand total of 25+ assignments (either extremely tedious programs or incredibly annoying/long worksheets) to prepare us for the test, and we all ended up putting each of them off until the day before they were respectively due.

“Did you do the four worksheets due today?” “Yeah, but I didn’t get a lot of them, especially #3 and #28 and #54.” “Okay, let’s all compare answers.”

Cue large huddle of CS2 students around Ben and my desk area.

“… hey guys, wanna play Warsow?” “… kay! =D”

We just never learn.

Four days before the AP test, I sunk into my office chair and prepared to do some illegal downloading navigation of the murky waters of the Intarwebz, when suddenly the Pidgin icon in my systray lit up with a notification.

Score. Someone wants to talk to me. And no, I’m not a loser with no friends.

“So did you finish program 11?”

Ehh. It’s just Steven.

“No I haven’t. Actually, there’s like six worksheets due tomorrow, maybe we should do them.”
“Yeah… maybe we should. Wanna do them together?”
“What’s there to lose; I get to learn from an ‘uber-hardcore programming class’ member, after all :P”

Three hours, six worksheets, much scrolling through the Gridworld student guide, and countless laughs later, we’re done. And disturbingly, I actually feel semi-prepared for the test.

… so we spent the next day in class playing around on our laptops and poking fun at Alex’s inability to play FPS games without the aid of Windows Task Manager covering half the screen.

And then Monday the 4th rolled around. The fateful day before the APCS test.

“Good luck on the test, everyone. I’m sure you’re very sufficiently prepared for it, seeing as how you find the time to play your games during class after - I’m sure - completing all the necessary worksheets.”

… damn Ms. Pittman and her sadistic sense of sarcasm.

Tuesday the 5th. Judgement day. I end up breezing through the test and - I kid you not - have fun while doing so. After triumphantly finishing off my last bit of code with a twirl of my pencil and a flourish (and adding “THIS IS SPARTA” in some comment somewhere), I sit back in my seat and glance around. The APCS2 students are all slowly finishing, apathetic looks pasted on their faces; looking good, comrades. How’s APCS3 doing?

Every single one of them is glaring tempestuously at their exam booklets. Alex is running his fingers through his hair nervously, Nik is hunched over, Spencer is squinting with all the concentration of a hundred carefully aimed laser beams, Steven seems so utterly SRS he looks like he’s about to break his pencil in half any moment, and Brandon is scribbling away faster than I was after I woke up from a nap in the middle of the English Language exam. I couldn’t help giggling silently to myself.

Haha, owned.

———————————————————————————–

–> WHY I ENJOYED APCS: it’s a love-hate relationship
(or, “Alex, stop being a faggot; Clayton, you’re a prick; and for god’s sakes Nate, SHUT UP”)

From my descriptions, one would think that I’d hate APCS. It was difficult at times, it was tedious, it was annoying, it gave us false hope, and I had some of the most snarky and annoying seniors as my classmates. Our teacher was the incarnation of all of the evil female rulers combined, mixed well with sarcasm and sadistic happiness (but we somehow liked her anyways because she was actually incredibly tolerant of us). We stayed up late hours and spent our lunches programming, we were constantly subject to boring notes and even more boring assignments.

I don’t remember everyone in my AP Government class with striking clarity. I haven’t stereotyped each member of my AP Biology class because I enjoyed their company. I didn’t enjoy slaving through AP Calculus AB. Why? Because it wasn’t a group effort. There was no sense of community, of camaraderie.

So why did I like APCS? Simply because we suffered through it together. We somehow managed to keep the environment lighthearted, we had fun, we laughed together, and I highly doubt -any- of us would’ve made it through that class alive without helping each other (okay, so Brandon is our exception). And who can resist the programming jokes that we constantly share? (I can’t remember any precisely, but Ben made a pretty good try… catch one in the library, instigating laughter from Steven and me while eliciting a blank look to Sapphi’s face). And for some unknown reason, even though it was the class we were the least serious in, the class where we slacked off most, the class with the most lenient system (we were pretty much free to do anything as long as we turned in programs on time, give or take an hour or so)… more than any other class, I feel as if I really LEARNED something in this class. As I said in my letter to MIT:

In CS, whenever one of our classmates finds a problem with his programs, we all gather around the monitor and put all of our knowledge together; thinking as hard as we possibly can to come up with the perfect solution. The feeling of satisfaction that accompanies a success is priceless, but the happiest feeling is the fact that without any one of the contributors, we wouldn’t have finished quite as fast; everyone’s talents, pieced together, created something amazing that we were all able to learn from.

Okay, so maybe that was prettied-up and polished to sound eloquent, but despite my dislike of sappy words, I really felt a connection to my classmates. I have never, in all 17 years of my life, felt as accepted as I did in that class. Even if I didn’t play FPS games with the others, even if “that’s what she said” jokes didn’t carry quite the same connotation (well, I laughed at them anyways because I found them sadly hilarious), even if I lacked a significantly greater amount of testosterone… this was the only class in my entire high-school career in which I felt like I belonged. It was the class I ended up looking forward to most. It was, hands-down, no-arguing, my absolute favourite class.

Toss in the fact that it was the only class where we could throw around insults and not have a sensitive teenage girl whining about how “offensive” we were being, and that just adds a large bonus to the awesome. Appreciation of sarcasm and tasteful racist/sexist jokes is a wonderful thing.

———————————————————————————–

–> AT THE END OF THE DAY: you’re another year older
(or, “I spent my last days of HS working on a freaking CS program?!”)

After the AP test, you’d think we’d finally get a break and get to play FPS games in peace, but such was not the case. In fact, even after AP tests we had Gridworld worksheets to finish up, and an entire chapter to learn. I guess Ms. Pittman, who officially left the school after this year, wanted to leave with a bang. And she did, if you count the imitation gun I held to my head on various occasions.

Our final assignment (and my last piece of high-schoolwork ever) was an extremely long-winded project (which I still have in my possession - no way am I throwing away 10+ hours of work!) In fact, the entire last week of school (all three days of it) I ended up hanging out in the CS classroom nearly the entire day just so I could complete the program. The fact that Patrick wanted to keep my company, Steven insisted on helping me “fix” the efficiency problems, and Clayton kept on gloating about how he hadn’t procrastinated.. well, let’s just say I didn’t get a lot of emotional support from my fellow classmates. Rather, they were all just as frustrated as I was. I remember one of the days, when I realized I had a test to make up, and sat between Steven and Patrick as I did it, with Russell, Nate, and Thomas behind me and Khanh to the front. All of us (save Steven - the CS3 group didn’t have an extra chapter to cover, lucky them :P) were anxiously programming away.

I was slightly miffed I had to spend my last days of HS working on a freaking CS program, but in a way I can’t imagine spending it any other way. I got to spend my last days in the one room where I belonged, where I had some of the best times of the year (the library comes close second), and where many close friendships formed (okay guys, I’ll admit it, I don’t hate you all as much as I pretended to. Really.) So yes. I spent my last glory days in the CS classroom (and other various memorable locales, but that’s another entry entirely). And you know what? I wouldn’t have had it any other way =D

———————————————————————————–

–> AND THE FUTURE DRAWS NEAR: away we go, into the new world
(or, “How many of us are actually going to major in CS anyways?!”)

Yes, contrary to popular belief, I do look away from the computer screen to breathe in spare a bit of care for my former classmates. Russell, Nate, and Thomas will be seniors this coming year. The rest of the group will be successfully spread out through ACC and the UT education network. Oh yeah, and Alex is going to some place in San Marcos no one’s even heard of. Naturally, I will be the one journeying farthest away, to Massachusetts and MIT. And you know.. not all of us are majoring in CS, but I’m fairly certain we all have connection to it in some way/shape/form. Ben’s doing Electrical Engineering, Khanh’s going into Mech E, Clayton to Mgmt InfoSys (?), and the rest of us to some form of CS (course 6 EECS for me ;D). It’ll be interesting to see where we end up, so see you all at 10-year reunion, where we can once again compare the frustrations of life.

“What so you work for Intel?” “No, I’m a network security admin for the CIA.” “So what, I work for Google.” “Screw Google.” “Yeah, we’re working on the problem of efficient psuedo-4D rendering too, wanna compare answers?” “… hey guys, wanna play Warsow?”

I’m not a nerd. I swear. I’m just a very selectively social geek.

Number of times FPS games were mentioned in this post: 13